This was gonna be a whirlwind trip. So we decide to leave at 11 am the next morning as Sweet Sister in Law #1 had lesson plans to attend to for her sub.
Tomorrow arrives, I'm packed and ready. Since this whole piggin thing I can be packed and gone at a moments notice. We borrow Handy Dandy Brother in law's car. It gets much better gas mileage than my SUV and lets face it Christmas was coming on. Now we had decided to take the southern route. OMG its 26 hours from my house to Virgina. There is no good way to get to Virgina from my house I would learn. Sunny and nice in Texas we left in shorts and a t-shirt. ( not smart ) Everything is rolling along fine and we hear about a hurricane out in the ocean somewhere over in the east. It does not dawn on us that this could affect us. We called Just Like my Own and said we are on our way. I had sent Miss Priss off with friends to go piggin. So I was worried about Just Like my Own and Miss Priss all at the same time.
Well we drive and we drive and we drive. Woooooooo its getting to be a long drive. Now as with all trips of any nature, Sweet Sister in law#1 and I pick a song we like and we sing. Then we channel surf til we find it again and sing some more. Well it gets late and we stop somewhere in Louisiana for food. It seems to be getting a little chilly but not to bad so we remain in our shorts. Now you have to realize we are driving and not stopping alot. DH calls and says " I really wish you would stop and sleep". You know I say "oh we will". Then my daddy calls and says " you really need to stop and sleep". I say " oh we will". I look at Sweet Sister in Law and we laugh. Forrrrrrrget about itttttttttt we are women hear us roar, the cub is in trouble. In other words HELL NO we ain't stopping! So we drive and we get to Ft. Payne, Alabama and over the radio we hear the words ROCK SLIDE. UGH O k problema! So we decide after listening the road will be passable.
So by this time its cold outside and I mean Baby its cold. So we decide to stop in Ft. Payne, Alabama and change clothes and get a drink and check the rock slide situation. It must be safe after all that country group Alabama lives here. We are quite sure cause all we have heard for the last 100 miles is Christmas in Dixie and Dixieland Delight! Yes we have been singing and Yes we have it memorized!
So we pull in to the quickie mart. We get in the trunk and grab some sweats. In we go. Now I did not notice when we went in really if there was a cashier or not. Now its about 3am. So we head to the bathroom to tinkle and change our clothes. We were in there a good while. We come out and I get the required Monster Mocha for us and Sweet Sister in law is trying to decide sweet or salty. Then it dawns on me. Kinda dark in here. We look around. " Ummmm Sweet sister in law#1 I say, "I don't think there is anyone at home here at the quickie mart in Ft. Payne, Alabama! So we run to the car. Now, we get down the road and stop laughing and I think you know Sweet sister in law #1, what if that clerk was hurt or worse DEAD! I had all kinds a things runnin through my mind. We decided someone just forgot to lock up. I said well if not and theres something odd going on they are going to see 2 fluffy girls go in the bathroom in shorts and come out in sweats laughing. I bet they will wonder WHAT THE HELL!
So here we go onward toward Chattanooga. Well you know who is driving and its cold and dark and I need to stay awake. OMG what do I find in Handy Dandy brother in laws car? A Statler Brothers Greatest Hits! HEAVEN! So here we go out into the dark night toward a rock slide just a singing. There was gospel which we sung louder and all kinds of good Statler Music. I think we were delirious. We kept playing that C.D. all the way to Chattanooga. Well we get to Chattanooga and what do we hear when we switch the radio. ( we had wondered where all the emergency vehicles we met had gone ) Well now we are informed about 10 minutes as we passed through POO DUNK across the state line Tennessee. ROCK SLIDE! Road closed behind us won't be open for months. We are not worried that just means we will have to go back 40 through Tennessee and yes stop and see my mama and them! There ya go problem solved! So we trudge onward! OH NO! we hit Oneida and we see a flashing light ROCK SLIDE! Interstate Closed. Now not being familiar with this stretch of road cause my family all live in Kingston/Harriman area I have no idea how to get around this. Its too late to call my daddy. So we just keep driving. A Ford Taurus can climb right. Well GOOD NEWS, we hit that slide and detoured right around it. Yep dark mountain road, two fluffy girls singing with the Statlers! Girls rule, its smooth sailing now.
So we are driving and driving with potty stops here and there. Virgina is really pretty but not lots of premium potty stops! Virgina folks aren't friendly either. I decided they are kinda like Yankees only south of the Mason Dixon. So we flip off the Statlers and there is ONE count it ONE radio station! We get some news though. We are headed right for a Hurricane! YEP Hurricane! only us. So DH calls and says Honey, now don't panic ( I never panic so not sure what his issue was ) "there is a Hurricane and you are headed right toward it". Seems we were headed to Norfolk, Virgina and what the hell so was the hurricane! So we keep driving we are to silly stupid now and we just laugh and laugh we are headed to a hurricane, we discuss what we should do. Well it is us Sweet Sister in Law and I just laugh and say ON WARD! Now its raining! I mean really raining. The hurricane has not arrived yet and its like raining like I have never seen rain! We get to Richmond, and I call Just Like my Own. She says ummmm you theres a hurricane coming. I was like YEP and your aunt and I decided COOL WE NEVER SAW A HURRICANE! Yes, folks we were about too. The Texan and Displaced Tennessean were headed into it.
Well the hurricane decided to make its arrival just as we get into Norfolk! What do we do? What any other person with a sick cub would do. We stop and get her some Kentucky Fried Chicken! Now that bucket was hard to hold on to in that wind! We go to Just Like my Owns house and omg we had driven silly all the way to Virgina and baby daddy mama was there! I was like well HELL! I drove all this way and thought you were alone and dying and you have babydaddymama here! I said it just like that, all one word. GET THIS! Just Like my Own said, "But I was Lonely!" So I have left someone dead at a quikie mart, memorized the Statlers, managed to avoid not one but 2 rock slides in a ford Taurus and driven into a hurricane to bring you Kentucky Fried Chicken and YOU ARE LONELY! I'm going to the hotel. So Sweet Sister in Law and I head to the hotel! Said Hotel had no electricity and the hurricane was just about here. We requested a high floor so our undies and such would not get wet. The lady at the front desk says, I have the reservation but we can't let you in as there is a hurricane A COMING! Well now I just about lose it, I've been up ohhhhhhhh about 30 hours, memorized the STatlers and gotten the chicken! I need a room! She says but there is no Electricity. I say I DON'T care, all I'm going to do is sleep anyway! So she says OK. We head to our room! Now the wind is blowing and I dont' mean a breeze, its a hurricane after all. OMG! I look at Sweet Sister in Law #1 and we count our Virgina Slims. There is no way we have enough Virgina Slims to get us through a hurricane! So what do I do, you guessed it. I throw my fluffy body against the wind and make it to the Taurus. I get there and I'm soaked. Just getting in the car seat got soaked. So I go to the nearest 7-11 and get Virgina Slims, plenty of Virgina Slims! Back to the hotel I go. My previous parking space is now under water and its rising. I think Handy Dandy Brother in law is going to kill me if his Taurus floats away! So I park on high ground and walk. Now I'm soaked and it dawns on me I forgot the coke Zero and the Sunkist! Guess what folks................ back to the 7 - 11.
I finally get back and we stand on the balcony with the slims and the drinks and we watch the hurricane. It was really pretty and good thing I parked on high ground or the Taurus would have floated back to Richmond! Well we take a little nap. Yes, I sleep well when it rains. I love storms so no problem.
We wake up and its dawns on us. We are hungry. He have to eat right! It takes calories to maintain this body. So head back to the Taurus. Now, people were kinda looking at us like we were off our rocker! No, we were hungry. So we pick up Just Like my Own and babydaddy. The only thing open was IHOP! Now this is where it got murky. I needed to feed Just Like my Own in the middle of a hurricane cause she was preggers and needed to eat as she's too skinny anyway! Well we order. BABYDADDY did not order as he refused to let me buy breakfast. Now I'll tell you I was pissed. You do not tell a southern mama you can't eat cause you forgot your wallet. I do tell you I wanted to slap his Yankee Ohio head clean off. I did I really did. Sweet Sister in Law #1 told me to be nice. I can not be nice. If you know me you know that. Now babydaddy picks this time to ask me if I like him. Well you know, if you can't say something nice come sit by me. So I answered him NOPE! He kinda looked stunned. So we ate our meal and took Just Like my Own home in the hurricane. Then we went to the hotel and guess what Virgina Electric had mercy on us and the lights were on. We could watch T.V. We purely happy.
Well happiness did not last long. I said Sweet Sister in Law #1 lets go to the coast. I'd never seen waves that big you see and the lady on the weather channel was saying they were BIG! So he hop in the Taurus and off we go! now half the tunnel was under water but we made it! We stood on the beach holding on to each other trying to smoke a slim but the wind was too bad! So we just stood there and it was AWESOME! We lasted about 5 minutes as it was cold as HELL!
Back to the hotel we went. We rested and then took Just Like my Own shopping because it was 32 darn degrees out and she was... yes she was ... wearing flip flops. SO we shopped and she spread the pig flu. Well I decided I wanted to see the sites. I'm here might as well right. So we dragged Pig flu pregger girl and babydaddy out to see the sites! I had fun not real sure she did! I bought her Olive Garden to shut her whiney butt up.
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